Friday, April 1, 2016


Here begins my #AtoZChallenge again :)
How does it feel when someone turned you on and left?
- Switch

Do you know what it is to feel abandoned? Truth is, you do. Because no one ever has crossed life without being at least ditched by one person whom you knew. And, all of us would have either deliberately or inevitably avoided someone who knew us. So, what is the dharma behind ignoring and getting ignored? Let's separate this into two parts.

First, getting ignored. Why do someone have to ignore us for no fault of ours? Do we deserve it? There is something called ‘sonder’ which means everyone have their personal space and life, miles apart from yours. You are not their priority and integral part of another’s life. This truth is not easy to take as it slaps you hard. To grapple with such a situation you should make yourself as interesting as possible for the maximum time you spend with in your life is yourself. Cultivate exciting hobbies. Learn new ones and keep exploring your likes. Make friends with yourself and stand independent irrespective of how people around you see you. Your self esteem has the power to influence what others think about you. Don't be too much guilty for your mistakes and chide yourself for faults. Rectify your mistakes and love yourself more than ever.

Second part is easy to handle except for the guilt. Some importunate or innocent soul probably counted you their dearest and you had to avoid them because you were not comfortable with that person. Remember the sonder rule in getting ignored. It's okay to pass on bad things as you receive them, at least that could get you a feeling of balance in life. (More importantly don't forget to pass on the good deeds too). Don't hurt anyone, but politely drift away if that's the best for you. After all friends are by choice and your choices strengthen or weaken you. If it is strength that matters, you can very well categorise people as asset and liability without hurting them and letting go because ‘you’ should be your first priority and it is equally important that you don't hurt yourself as much as not hurting others.

Sometimes it is unavoidable to avoid someone but it is avoidable to get yourself irked. Be and do the best thing for yourself and make your tick mark with righteousness to know you are doing the right thing.


  1. I felt retrospective when I read this! 'A'wesome article! 'Sonder' thanks for the word, was searching for such a word!

  2. Hi, dropping by from the A-Z Challenge! You're right. The key is to be good to yourself, and try to be as good to others as possible but not beating yourself up over it too much. People are human, they make mistakes.

  3. What a wonderful explanation for everyone.. It's all about the spaces, how much we give and how much we want..


  4. It's all about Sonder!!
    When we ignore someone, being ignored comes with that. Nice one Malavika....all the best for A~Z...

  5. Well I have avoided many people for then to have been annoying. With negativity or sheer intrusion in my life. Enjoyed reading your post!

  6. Well I have avoided many people for then to have been annoying. With negativity or sheer intrusion in my life. Enjoyed reading your post!

  7. Nice. Well written.Keep writing.

  8. "do the best thing for yourself" very much inspired by this doubt its absolutely true if v live for our self it gives great pleasure, mental happiness and peace

  9. Why should one ignore other person merely on the reason of not being comfortable with him/her? Getting ignored by the dearest and nearest after long acquaintance is painful to the heart and many memorable moments would constantly haunt. It is important to guard our happiness and self esteem, and at the same time, is there not a way to make others understand about the needed pace for both?



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