Friend

The definition of who a friend is, is complex and varies from person to person. I remember a birthday card which had lovely wishes except for one sentence which said that friends change with time and I had to paste a paper over it and change the word. I had different expectations and definitions for a friend with respect to my age. When I was 8, to me, friend was one person who will be with you forever. I was not a people’s person and I never bothered to be one. I always longed for just one friend who will stand by me. But, I am selective and I choose my friends because of which I even lost out on a diamond when I was busy collecting stones. I had one person who stood by me when everyone else deserted me, but I didn’t like her habits, her boisterous behaviour and stayed away.

When I was 14, I wanted to have a lot of friends and drastically changed myself accordingly. At that time, friends, to me were people who hugged me affectionately and waved at me enthusiastically every single time we met. At 17, friend, meant a bird of my feather, who was of my class and wavelength. Young blood was at its best and I kept in touch with all my old friends and always on a mission to make new ones. Ouch! I learnt that unlike school, I couldn’t trust people just because they were in my college but managed to wear the friendliness although I hardly called someone a ‘friend’.

At 23, I still make a lot of new friends, but learn from my past on what to expect and what not from people. Friend, to me is someone who knows your original self, accepts you anyway and loves you more than any mistake of yours could offend. Love, trust and friendship are inseparable. You cannot have one without the other. If you call someone a friend, make sure you mean it with all your heart and never let ego inside. It’s a pride to be stupid with your loved ones than to win over them. The more you fight, the more you understand how much you can give up for each other and get glued by love and trust. At this epoch, friend to me is someone who takes efforts to stay in touch with me and pacify me on my hard days. In the end the one thing that would matter is, who came in but never left and helped you when you were low and I’m glad that I have them already.

Tips for a good friendship:

*Give your friend, their personal space, don’t barge in too much

*Give them their personal time, don’t pester them to talk to you 24*7

*The more you give up for them, the more you win, never ever let ego win you.